Understanding Menstruation and Period Pain: Navigating What's Normal
At 19 years of age and identifying as transgender male (without any gender-affirming treatments yet), I find myself navigating the complexities of menstruation and the accompanying discomfort. My BMI categorizes me as overweight, and while I haven’t been regularly exercising, I recently left a job where I lifted heavy items. My daily activity still keeps me quite mobile, managing to walk around 15,000 steps each day, primarily relying on walking, cycling, or public transportation for my travels. Ethnically, I'm Caucasian, with roots mainly in Irish, Polish, and Italian backgrounds, although I’m unsure how much that’s relevant to my discussion.
This year marked my first attempt at tracking my menstrual cycles, with the durations of my periods being 42 days, 30 days, and 38 days respectively. Currently, I am not on any medication. In my past, I was prescribed Prozac for a brief six-month period when I was 15. My experience with that medication wasn’t positive, and after expressing my concerns to my psychiatrist — who dismissed my worries — I decided to stop suddenly. Surprisingly, I faced no withdrawal symptoms and felt relief almost immediately afterward.
I’ve been diagnosed with autism (requiring low support), bulimia, and a few other mental health issues that probably don’t have much bearing on this situation. Physically, I don't have any diagnosed medical conditions that I’m aware of.
From what I learned in my human sexuality class, menstrual cycles typically range from 21 to 35 days. This information has amplified my long-standing worry about the pain I experience during my period, especially since my cycles tend towards the longer side. My period experiences have varied significantly; on one occasion, I had no symptoms leading up to my period, but then suddenly faced severe cramps with no warning. This escalated so quickly that I lost sensation in my legs, and I began bleeding only moments later. Conversely, there are times when I don’t experience any symptoms at all, which, although delightful, is quite rare. Typically, the discomfort is so intense that over-the-counter medications fail to provide relief; I have even unwittingly taken too much medication in desperate attempts to alleviate the pain. Using a heating pad at maximum temperature, alongside pain relief, sometimes helps, but on some occasions, neither has any effect.
During my periods, I have also experienced nausea, numbness, lightheadedness, and sensitivity to light. My menstrual flow seems to fall within the moderate range; while there are infrequent times when I need to change sanitary products every hour, this isn’t the norm and adds to the unpredictability of my cycle. Additionally, the number of days I bleed can be quite sporadic.
My mother has never fully understood the extent of my pain and only bought a heating pad after she grew exasperated with my attempts to soak towels in warm water. This suggests to me that she doesn’t grasp the severity of what I endure, leading me to question whether I might be overreacting. Regardless, it feels as though I'm one of the few individuals I know who consistently suffers from incapacitating pain, although I don’t face any discomfort outside of my menstruation.
Is this level of pain considered normal? My mother has suggested that I see a gynecologist, but the very thought of it terrifies me for various reasons. Furthermore, there isn’t anyone in my family I can approach for guidance, as discussions about menstruation are generally taboo. I had to learn about it all on my own when I had my first period. I might seek professional help from a gynecologist at some point, but I prefer to delay that unless absolutely necessary.
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