Experiencing Pain During Erection and Ejaculation After Kidney Stones: Seeking Insights
I’m reposting this on behalf of my uncle, who is a 57-year-old man, weighing 170 pounds and standing six feet tall. He has a history of Lyme disease, does not take any medications, avoids drugs, smokes, and consumes no alcohol. Last year, he suffered from kidney stones on two occasions—once in the spring and once again in the fall. His condition in the spring was quite severe, bordering on sepsis, and he should have been hospitalized, as revealed later by blood tests conducted at urgent care, although no follow-up was made subsequent to that. Since that initial stone incident in the spring, he has encountered challenges in his intimate life. He reports that when he achieves an erection, he experiences pain at the base of his penis along with significant pressure. During ejaculation, while he feels some pleasure, it is also accompanied by discomfort. After ejaculation, he suffers from pain at the base for several hours and discomfort in his groin area. The situation has worsened following the second incident of kidney stones in the fall. He has consulted a urologist multiple times, who even had to perform a procedure to address scar tissue. The urologist advised him to sit while urinating to help relax his muscles and to stretch his penis twice daily. Despite this guidance, he continues to experience persistent pain and has been told by the urologist that frequent ejaculation may eventually alleviate his symptoms. Unfortunately, due to the ongoing discomfort, my uncle and his partner have been unable to engage in penetrative sex since last spring, relying only on oral and other forms of stimulation. The urologist has not provided the help he was hoping for, and my uncle feels that the pain may have intensified, leading to heightened anxiety about any sexual activity. He experiences no issues with urination and otherwise does not report discomfort. We are hoping that a urologist can weigh in on this situation and offer some guidance. His partner has been encouraging him to seek a second opinion, but he seems apprehensive about doing so.
Answers (1)

7/31/2025, 1:40:47 AM
OpenHealth AI
It sounds like your uncle is experiencing significant discomfort during intimate moments, which understandably can be quite distressing for him and his partner. The pain during erection and ejaculation post-kidney stones can be multifactorial, potentially involving scar tissue from procedures, muscle tension, or nervous system responses following his previous trauma with kidney stones.
Explanation
Kidney stones can lead to physical trauma and changes in pelvic floor dynamics, potentially resulting in conditions like pelvic floor dysfunction or penile pain syndromes. Scar tissue from previous urological procedures can also contribute to discomfort. His experience of heightened anxiety towards sexual activity due to pain is a common reaction that can further complicate the situation.
Next Steps
Here are some actionable steps your uncle can consider:
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Continue Muscle Relaxation Techniques: In addition to urinating sitting down, he might benefit from pelvic floor exercises or gentle stretching of the pelvic muscles. These exercises can help reduce tension.
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Hydration and Diet: Encourage him to drink plenty of water and consider dietary adjustments to reduce the risk of further kidney stones, which may alleviate some of the overarching concerns. Consulting a nutritionist familiar with kidney stone prevention can be helpful.
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Sexual Health Practices: He may find it beneficial to explore sexual activities that minimize discomfort, focusing on what feels pleasurable without causing pain. Communication with his partner about comfort levels can help ease his anxiety.
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Pain Management: Over-the-counter pain relief, such as ibuprofen (if he has no contraindications), might help mitigate discomfort during sexual activities. He should follow recommended dosages and consult a healthcare provider if unsure.
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Seek a Second Opinion: Although he feels apprehensive, obtaining a second opinion from another urologist who specializes in sexual health may yield additional treatment options or alternative approaches to manage pain.
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Psychological Support: Since anxiety around sex can play a significant role, he may find it beneficial to speak with a mental health professional specializing in sexual health issues to address any psychological barriers.
Encouraging your uncle to take these steps may lead to improvements in his well-being and intimacy. Let him know that it's essential to prioritize his comfort and that seeking further help is a positive and proactive move.
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