Seeking Guidance on Aunt’s Hospice Request Without a Diagnosis
I’m reaching out for assistance regarding my aunt, who is 88 years old and has expressed a desire for hospice care, despite not having an official diagnosis. I reside on the opposite coast, making it challenging to be physically present, and my aunt has consistently preferred solitude, eschewing visits from family, including myself, for several years. My mother, who is 81, manages to visit her every few years and is scheduled to arrive on Monday. I want to support them as best as I can from a distance. Over the past eight years, my aunt has faced numerous health challenges. Recently, she has struggled significantly with consuming solids, reverting to a diet of broth and water, and even then, she can only manage tiny amounts due to excruciating pain in her intestines. Having been bedridden for the past month, she is now developing sores. Three months ago, diagnostic tests, including scans and bloodwork, revealed a minor infection, but nothing else could be determined, leading to a course of antibiotics. Despite her decline, she remains resolute against visiting a hospital, complicating our efforts to pinpoint her condition, and she is growing weaker to the point of finding it difficult to speak. My aunt is insured through Medicare, Medicaid, and NY State Teacher’s Medical Insurance, and she resides in a small village in the Hudson Valley. I’d greatly appreciate any insights or advice on several points: - Is it acceptable to respect her wishes by not pressing her to seek medical help or visit a doctor, even in light of her current state? It feels unsettling not having a clear diagnosis at her age, and I can’t help but wonder if there might still be treatable issues. - I’m under the impression that without a formal diagnosis, she may not meet the criteria for hospice care, so I’m curious about any alternative options we could explore. - Are there resources I can contact to obtain guidance on improving her care and comfort in her locale? Currently, she has a dedicated cleaner who comes in for four hours daily, but I feel she needs more help. On a personal note, my aunt is a remarkable individual—vibrant, funny, and fascinating, who loves her eight cats dearly but simply resists any form of medical intervention.
Answers (1)
3/26/2025, 4:20:47 AM
OpenHealth AI
It's commendable that you are seeking to support your aunt during this challenging time. Given her advanced age and current condition, addressing her wishes with empathy while ensuring her comfort is crucial. Here are the main points to consider regarding your aunt's situation:
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Respecting Her Wishes: While it can be challenging to accept, it's essential to honor her desire for no further medical intervention if she is competent to make that choice. Her comfort and autonomy are paramount, even if her situation is unsettling.
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Criteria for Hospice Care: Hospice care generally requires a terminal diagnosis with a prognosis of six months or less to live. Although a definitive diagnosis for your aunt is missing, you can still explore hospice options. Many hospices are willing to assess individuals based on their overall health and functional status rather than strictly on a formal diagnosis.
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Improving Comfort and Care: There are several resources available to enhance her care locally.
Steps to Take:
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Contact Local Hospice Services: Reach out to hospice providers in her area to discuss her situation. They can evaluate her circumstances and see if she may qualify for their services based on her health and care needs rather than strict diagnostic criteria.
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Home Health Care Options: Consider contacting local home health agencies for additional help. Services can range from personal care assistance to nursing services, which might provide her with more comfort and care. You can ask about care options specifically for patients who prefer to remain at home.
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Pain Management Support: Consult resources or professionals specializing in palliative care who can provide guidance on managing her pain effectively. Even if she avoids in-person visits, phone consultations may be viable options.
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Family Support: Encourage your mother to engage in open discussions with your aunt about her preferences and comforts during her visit. If feasible, gentle conversations about small comfort measures (e.g., pain relief options, additional home help) can provide mutual reassurance.
Additional Resources:
- Medicare Resources: Look into Medicare's guidelines for hospice services. They may have more specific criteria or rules that apply in her case.
- Community Resources: Investigate programs offered by local non-profits or health departments that can assist families caring for elderly relatives. Many communities have support services for the elderly.
Your aunt's wishes to maintain her independence and comfort are important. Providing her with support while respecting her choices can ensure she feels loved and cared for during this time. If additional questions arise or you’d like further information, feel free to ask.
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