Seeking Insight on Grandmother's Remaining Time Amid Refusal of Treatment
My grandmother is 81 years old, standing at 4'11" and weighing approximately 90 to 100 pounds. Although I'm not certain about her current medications, I know she has had congenital heart disease since she was young, and it was diagnosed in her 30s. Earlier this month, she was hospitalized due to fluid accumulation in her right lung, which required draining about 1.5 liters. After a short stay, she was discharged, only to return to the hospital a few days later with the same issue. During this second visit, they drained the fluid again and performed a CT scan that revealed multiple lesions in her lung. Approximately five days later, she underwent surgery to remove the lesions and had the holes sealed to prevent further fluid buildup. Following this procedure, she was discharged once more on Tuesday, the 10th. However, a home care nurse visited today and confirmed that her lung was filling with fluid again, advising that she return to the hospital. In response, my grandmother has decided against further treatment and is firmly declining to go back. I can empathize with her decision; she has faced numerous hospital visits over the last few years for various health complications and is understandably exhausted. It seems she may be coming to terms with her situation, which is difficult yet perhaps peaceful. My primary concern now is understanding how much time we may have left with her, even if the timeframe is short. Please help us with any insights.
Answers (1)
2/14/2026, 6:00:55 AM
OpenHealth AI
I'm truly sorry to hear about your grandmother's condition, and it's commendable that you are seeking to understand her situation better. While it's challenging to predict exact timeframes, especially in complex cases like hers, I can provide some general insights about terminal conditions and practical steps you can employ to support her and the family during this time.
Key Points:
- Your grandmother is experiencing serious health issues including heart disease and lung complications, and her decision against continued treatment indicates she may be choosing a path that focuses on comfort.
- Understanding her possible time left involves factors including overall health, response to treatment, and her level of comfort with her choice.
Explanation: Given that your grandmother has multiple health challenges—congenital heart disease and now complications resulting in fluid accumulation and lung lesions—her prognosis may not be favorable. The recurrence of fluid buildup despite medical interventions usually suggests advanced disease. While some may have weeks to months, others may experience a more rapid decline. Terminal phases can often lead to significant changes in energy levels, appetite, and awareness.
It's important to remember that each individual is unique, and symptoms can progress differently. Her comfort and quality of life are paramount right now.
Next Steps:
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Comfort Care: Focus on making her comfortable at home. This might include adjusting her living space to be more accessible, arranging for comfortable seating, and ensuring she has her favorite items and medications at hand.
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Palliative Care: Consider engaging a palliative care team if you haven’t already. They specialize in providing relief from symptoms and stress caused by serious illnesses, focusing on improving quality of life.
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Discuss Wishes: Have open conversations with her about her wishes regarding her care, and ensure that you are all supportive of her choices. This respect can lead to more peaceful moments for your family.
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Monitor Symptoms: Keep an eye on her symptoms—be aware of changes in her breathing, comfort level, and emotional state. This will help you provide the best support and adjustments to her care as needed.
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Seek Support for Yourself: Caring for a loved one in this situation can be emotionally taxing. Make sure you have access to support for yourself, whether through friends, family, or professional counseling.
You’re not alone in this, and it's natural to seek reassurance. Wishing you and your grandmother peace during this time. If you have more questions or need further information, feel free to ask.
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