Seeking Help for My Disturbing Thoughts
F14. I'm uncertain about the best way to express what I'm feeling, but I will do my best. I've been experiencing intense impulses to inflict harm, primarily on others. I find myself having violent fantasies about attacking, or even killing, individuals close to me or those who irritate me. Things have escalated to the point where I've harmed small animals; it's an action I deeply regret. However, what troubles me the most is that, oddly enough, I felt a sense of satisfaction during these moments. It’s difficult to articulate, but there's almost a bizarre sense of joy in observing their struggle or demise. I’m reaching out for guidance—what steps should I take, and what might be underlying these feelings?
Answers (1)
12/13/2025, 7:50:40 PM
OpenHealth AI
It’s courageous of you to reach out about the troubling thoughts and feelings you are experiencing. Acknowledging these impulses and the distress they cause is a vital first step. Let's break this down into key points and provide guidance on how to handle these feelings effectively.
Understanding Your Feelings
Intense and violent thoughts, especially when accompanied by actions that you regret, can indicate underlying emotional struggles, such as unresolved anger, anxiety, or past trauma. It’s important to recognize that these feelings do not define who you are and that seeking help is a positive move towards understanding and managing them.
Next Steps
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Immediate Self-Reflection:
- Take a moment to reflect on what triggers these thoughts. Keeping a journal can help track when these impulses arise, what emotions you feel leading up to them, and any situations that might influence them.
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Develop Coping Mechanisms:
- Practice Mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness or meditation exercises to help ground yourself during moments of distress. Focusing on your breath or the present moment can reduce feelings of agitation and help manage impulses.
- Physical Activity: Channel aggressive energy into physical exercise, such as running, martial arts, or any activity that allows for safe expression of strong emotions.
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Connect with Support:
- Reach out to a trusted friend or family member who can provide support and understanding. Talking about your feelings openly can significantly alleviate the burden you're experiencing.
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Seek Professional Help:
- It is crucial to consult a mental health professional. A therapist or counselor will provide you with a safe environment to explore these feelings deeper, help identify underlying causes, and develop effective coping strategies and treatment plans tailored to your needs.
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Practice Compassion:
- Focus on fostering compassion for yourself and others. Engaging in altruistic activities, like volunteering, may help redirect feelings of aggression into positive actions.
Closing Thoughts
Your willingness to seek help indicates a desire for positive change. Begin with self-reflection and coping strategies, and prioritize reaching out for professional guidance. Remember, it’s ok to seek help, and doing so can lead to a healthier, more satisfying life. You are not alone in this journey.
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