OpenHealth Q&A

Concerns About My Cardiologist Only Communicating with My Dad

This past year has been exceptionally challenging for my health (I’m 22), with a history of severe dysmenorrhea that evolved into critically low iron levels requiring frequent infusions. Then, the headaches started—debilitating migraines accompanied by auras such as tinnitus, nausea, and spinning sensations, persisting for days without any noticeable link to my menstrual cycle. Despite my gynecologist’s advice to discontinue my combined birth control, the migraines persisted. I then switched to a progesterone-only contraceptive but had to end that due to life circumstances. After several months without a period and after consulting a new gynecologist who investigated thoroughly, I was diagnosed with PCOS and multiple large fibroids. Currently, I'm on a new medication (Slynd) and awaiting a suitable time for surgery. Additionally, I experienced unexpected weight fluctuations, gaining 40 pounds rapidly and then losing 10 within a week, along with various digestive issues. I now believe these may be symptoms related to my other conditions, even though my specialists (and it’s a baffling thought at my age, having multiple specialists) all deem this normal. The most alarming issue, however, has been my episodes of tachycardia, where my heart rate would spike to around 115-120 bpm for extended periods. After some hesitation, I used my roommate's pulse oximeter for verification. Following a visit to the emergency room, where they found nothing egregious (just a slightly oversized heart and some atherosclerosis), the doctors attributed my symptoms to anxiety. But I am certain it’s not anxiety. After returning home for the summer (preparing for my final year at college), I decided to check my blood pressure using my father's cuff. The readings were concerning: 145/70, followed by 155/68 during subsequent checks. With a family history of hypertension—my father having high blood pressure since he was 18—he urged me to consult his cardiologist. Unfortunately, during the appointment, the cardiologist largely ignored me and directed his comments towards my dad, advising me to lose weight despite my balanced diet and regular workouts. Moreover, the cardiologist dismissed my symptoms as resulting from anemia without communicating that to me directly, conveying all information only to my father. Initially, I chalked it up to a misunderstanding because they called early one morning while I was still asleep. However, during my iron infusions, my nurse expressed concern about my blood pressure being significantly elevated (like 160/85). This high pressure persisted at every infusion session, regardless of treatment effects. Out of concern, my father contacted the cardiologist’s office to schedule an appointment ahead of my return to college. Supposedly (and given my father’s forgetfulness, I can't be sure), they decided to prescribe me amlodipine without ever consulting me personally. There was no direct communication regarding my symptoms, no explanation of the medication, nor assessment of possible interactions with my birth control—of which there are significant risks pertaining to hyperkalemia and stroke. I'm picking up the medication today and plan to consult with the pharmacist about potential interactions. Yet, I can’t shake this feeling of unease regarding the cardiologist’s office. I don’t mind sharing information with my dad—communication is vital—but I firmly believe I should be directly involved in discussions about my health. Now, I'm left questioning whether this situation is typical and how I might navigate it while still keeping my father as one of my emergency contacts. His involvement is important to me, but I also need to advocate for my own healthcare communication.

Answers (1)

8/13/2025, 3:21:23 PM

OpenHealth AI

It's completely understandable to feel uneasy and frustrated with the communication style of your cardiologist, especially given the complexity of your health issues. Advocacy for your own healthcare is essential, and you deserve to be directly involved in discussions that affect your medical treatment. Here’s how you can navigate this situation:

Main Points:

1. Communication with your healthcare providers is important, and you have the right to be involved in your own health decisions.
2. It's advisable to prepare for your next appointments by bringing your questions and concerns to ensure you receive the information you need.
3. You can advocate for yourself while still involving your father as a support system.

Explanation:

Many patients feel sidelined when healthcare providers predominantly address family members instead. While having someone accompany you to appointments can be beneficial, it should not come at the cost of your direct communication with your doctors. You are the one experiencing the symptoms and treatments, and your voice is crucial in your healthcare journey.

Actionable Steps:

1. Prepare for Your Next Appointment: Write down your symptoms, concerns, and any questions you have regarding your current health status, medications, and treatment plans. Bring this list to your appointment to facilitate direct communication.

2. Speak Up During Appointments: At the beginning of your visit, politely express that you'd like to engage directly in your care discussions. You can say something like, “I appreciate my father’s involvement, but I’d like to understand this directly so I can advocate for my health.”

3. Consult with Your Pharmacist: When you pick up your medication, discuss your concerns about potential interactions with your birth control and any side effects you should monitor. Pharmacists can provide valuable information about medications.

4. Document Your Symptoms: Keep a log of your symptoms, blood pressure readings, and any changes you notice. This documentation can help you articulate your experiences to your healthcare providers and advocate for further evaluations if necessary.

5. Consider a Second Opinion: If you continue to feel uncomfortable with the cardiologist, consider seeking a second opinion. Finding a healthcare provider who respects your need for direct communication can help alleviate some of your concerns.

6. Direct Communication with Your Father: Talk to your dad about how you feel regarding the communication with the cardiologist. Explain that you value his involvement but also need to manage your health discussions personally.

Remember, your health is a top priority, and you have every right to ask questions, seek clarity, and take charge of your healthcare journey. You are not alone in this, and seeking support can help you navigate these interactions more effectively.