OpenHealth Q&A

Get answered by medical professionals

Concerns About My Father's Health

7/16/2025, 10:30:54 PMMale25-34

Hello everyone, I have been quietly observing here on behalf of my father. He is a 59-year-old man who has unfortunately suffered from untreated mental health issues over the past 5 to 10 years, which have severely affected his overall well-being. Earlier this January, we had to take him to the hospital, where he was diagnosed with advanced kidney disease—specifically, stage four—with an estimated glomerular filtration rate (eGFR) in the low twenties, though I don’t recall the exact figure. Additionally, he was on the verge of heart failure. For the past five years, his blood pressure readings have consistently exceeded 200. After his hospital stay, he left without really changing his habits. I fear he lacks the motivation to alter his lifestyle, which includes a diet high in fast food, regular consumption of soda, smoking, poor sleep patterns, and intermittent use of methamphetamine. While I'm unsure of the meth's usage frequency, it has been present in his system. He undoubtedly neglects to take any prescribed medications. Recently, he began experiencing a set of troubling symptoms: mental cloudiness, a diminished appetite, frequent urination, nausea, and swelling—indicators often associated with the later stages of kidney and potential heart failure. Out of anxiety, he went to the emergency room but declined admission, choosing instead to leave. Although his condition seemed to improve for a short time, he is now reporting a return of those same symptoms. I am coming to terms with the reality that he is gravely ill. As I search for information online, I find numerous accounts of individuals facing similar health challenges who are actively seeking treatment, which is frustrating given my father's reluctance to pursue any help. How quickly can one's health deteriorate when one is neglecting to take steps in the opposite direction? While I understand that there are no clear-cut answers, I would greatly appreciate any insights that might help prepare me for what lies ahead.

LupusCrohn's DiseaseCOPD

Answers (1)

Cony

7/16/2025, 10:31:12 PM

OpenHealth AI

I'm sorry to hear about your father's situation; it sounds incredibly challenging for both of you. Concerns about serious health issues like advanced kidney disease, heart failure, and the behaviors you're describing understandably create anxiety about his health and future.

Main Points:

  1. Advanced kidney disease and heart failure can lead to rapid health deterioration if not managed.
  2. Lifestyle choices significantly impact his condition, and motivation to change is crucial.
  3. Immediate support and intervention are vital to address his health challenges.

Explanation: Your father’s advanced kidney disease and heart failure are serious conditions that can significantly worsen without proper care and lifestyle changes. When someone has stage four kidney disease, they are at a high risk of complications due to factors like high blood pressure, poor diet, substance use, and neglecting medication. This combination can lead to acute issues such as swelling, nausea, and cognitive changes, as you mentioned. It's important to recognize that deterioration can happen quickly—weeks or even days—if lifestyle factors and symptoms are not addressed.

Prioritized Next Steps:

  1. Encourage a Supportive Conversation: Try to have an open and non-confrontational conversation with your father about his health, emphasizing your concern and love. Understanding the impact of his current choices without judgment can help him open up.

  2. Research Resources: Look into local support groups or mental health resources that can help him with both his mental health and his physical health. Sometimes, engaging with others who struggle with similar issues can motivate change.

  3. Nutritional Changes: Encourage small dietary changes. You might start by suggesting he replace sodas with water or introduce one healthy meal per day. Involving him in meal planning might make it more engaging.

  4. Seek Professional Help: If he is resistant to seeing a doctor, consider contacting a healthcare professional yourself for advice on how best to encourage him to seek care. Palliative care services or home health agencies sometimes provide support to individuals who are hesitant to seek help.

  5. Monitor Symptoms: Keep track of his symptoms and encourage him to do the same. If more severe symptoms arise—like chest pain or severe swelling—express that it’s crucial to seek emergency care.

  6. Explore Motivational Strategies: Discuss the possibility of motivational interviewing strategies that could help him acknowledge his situation more fully and consider taking responsibility for his health.

It’s heart-wrenching to see a loved one struggle, but remember that consistent, gentle encouragement and expressing your concerns from a place of love can be a powerful motivator. You're doing an important job by being there for your father.

Related Questions

Seeking Insights: My Journey with Undiagnosed Neurological Symptoms

Hello everyone, I'm a 34-year-old female grappling with neurological symptoms that first appeared in October, and I’m eager to hear from anyone who might have faced similar challenges. My journey began with unexpected migraines, blurred vision, and an ongoing sensation of being off-balance or intoxicated. Gradually, I began experiencing mainly sensory-related symptoms, such as tingling and burning sensations, feelings of extreme heat and cold, sharp pains radiating in my arms and back, as well as discomfort in my hands and toes, alongside intermittent numbness. I also endure varying degrees of weakness and heaviness in my right side, specifically my arm and leg, although I haven’t suffered complete functional loss. The nature of my symptoms is erratic; they fluctuate rather than consistently deteriorate. An MRI revealed mild, scattered lesions in the white matter, which were deemed nonspecific. Further tests from a lumbar puncture returned normal results, showing no markers of inflammation, and the oligoclonal bands were not present. A thorough range of lab tests yielded no significant findings. After evaluating my case, the neurology team suggested a possible diagnosis of MS and administered a three-day course of intravenous steroids. While I noticed a slight improvement in some sensory pain, my symptoms persist and continue to vary day by day. I still experience headaches and pressure in my head along with episodes of blurred vision, but there have been no new deficits since treatment. I am reaching out to connect with others who have had similar experiences. I would like to learn about the insights or diagnoses you encountered and what treatments proved beneficial (such as those related to migraine disorders, dysautonomia, or sensory neuropathy, for example). If you have navigated a similar path, I would greatly appreciate your sharing your story. Thank you!

Multiple SclerosisLupusEndocrinology
Male25-34
26 minutes ago

Should I Seek Medical Attention for Left Ear Pulsatile Tinnitus?

A 31-year-old woman reports an ongoing issue with pulsatile tinnitus, which she is currently experiencing solely in her left ear. Although she's noticed this condition intermittently before, she hadn’t paid it much mind due to the absence of pain. Recently, however, her curiosity piqued her interest in researching the condition, where she stumbled upon information suggesting it could be serious. Usually, she avoids searching online for health worries, but now she is contemplating whether a visit to the doctor might be warranted. Can anyone advise on the need for a medical evaluation in this case?

LupusThyroid DisordersInternal Medicine
Male25-34
26 minutes ago

Concerns About Angular Cheilitis

I’m a 23-year-old woman with no history of smoking, and I’m seeking assistance regarding a health issue. Back in January, I experienced angular cheilitis three times, each episode involving a minor crack at the corner of my mouth that healed within a few days. Following the last occurrence, I became quite anxious due to saliva accumulation in that area. I found myself frequently brushing my finger along that spot. After a few days, I observed a small area forming that appeared white and had a rough texture. Eventually, I realized it was not just a coincidence, and I started taking action, but only after it became noticeably larger. To address it, I cleaned the area with a mix of alcohol and apple cider vinegar. I’m uncertain about what this issue could be, but I’ve recently begun using over-the-counter Clotrimazole cream while also keeping the area moisturized with either lanolin or petroleum jelly. Unfortunately, I haven’t noticed any improvement, and I’m concerned as it seems to be expanding. The patch continues to be rough and excessively dry. Although I can open my mouth wide without any cracks forming, I do feel tension in the skin, similar to having a bandage over that location. At times, I experience a burning sensation after thorough washing, and I’ve noticed tiny red spots appearing on the outer edges of the patch sporadically.

LupusInternal MedicineEndocrinology
Male25-34
46 minutes ago

Unusual Heart Sensation

I’m an 18-year-old, weighing 50 kilograms and standing at 170 centimeters (and yes, I’m aware that I’m quite slender). For the past couple of years, I’ve developed a habit of smoking about half a pack of cigarettes each day. So, the other day I was lying on my left side, relaxing, when I stumbled upon an unusual sensation. It felt as though my heart was pulsating so intensely that it was almost outside my body. Out of curiosity, I pressed a bit on the area and was instantly hit with a rush; my head started to tingle, my vision momentarily blurred, and it felt as though my heart dropped. It was as if my entire system had malfunctioned. Just for context, I’ve experienced something similar before after a ketamine overdose, and it persisted for about a month afterward, occurring occasionally while trying to sleep or during random moments in bed. This current episode has me quite anxious, especially since it hasn’t happened in a while, but this time felt particularly alarming.

Multiple SclerosisCOPDInternal Medicine
Male25-34
1 hour ago

Mass on the Glottis

Patient Details: 63-year-old male, height 165 cm, weight 66 kg, Asian descent. Lifestyle Factors: No history of smoking or alcohol consumption. Medical History: Diagnosed with asthma and angina. Current Medications: Uses a Symbicort inhaler and takes Concor tablets. Main Concern: A mass was detected during a gastroendoscopy carried out a year ago. There is no report of pain, but the patient experiences mild hoarseness. What might be the diagnosis?

AsthmaCOPDInternal Medicine
Male25-34
1 hour ago