Reflecting on My Mother’s Undiagnosed Cancer: A Personal Journey
My mother, who was 77 years old, stood at 5 feet tall and weighed 107 pounds. She was of Filipino descent. Tragically, two weeks ago, she succumbed to a cardiac arrest while undergoing treatment in the ICU for a pulmonary embolism. Just prior to her passing, we received some disheartening news regarding a recent cancer diagnosis. Reviewing her radiology reports leaves us questioning how we had overlooked the severity of her condition and how long the cancer may have been present before it was identified. During her annual health screening in February, her blood tests were within normal limits. It wasn’t until May that she began to voice concerns about pain in her back and neck. By early June, her condition had deteriorated; she had lost her appetite, felt increasingly weak, and experienced difficulty with her breathing. On her third visit to her primary care physician, she requested a CEA blood test, which had previously been part of her follow-up since her breast cancer diagnosis in 2000. The results were alarming, displaying a CEA level of 800. Shortly thereafter, the discovery of a pulmonary embolism led her to the emergency room, and within a week, we lost her. It was shocking to witness her rapid decline from a state of relative fitness to being confined to a hospital bed. **Cervical Spine MRI with and without Contrast Findings** 1. Extensive metastatic cancer involvement in the spinal column, with no pathological fractures observed. 2. Suspicion of early anterior epidural neoplasm at the T11, T12, L5, and S1 vertebral levels. 3. Possible 4 mm leptomeningeal tumor versus a benign schwannoma located at the L1-L2 level. 4. Presence of cerebellar metastasis. **Brain MRI with and without Contrast Findings** 1. Multiple small enhancing lesions dispersed throughout the cerebral and cerebellar regions, indicating metastatic disease without significant mass effect. 2. Small linear area of enhancement in the left internal auditory canal, raising concerns for metastasis. 3. Enhancing lesions within the clivus consistent with bony metastases. This experience has left me grappling with an overwhelming sense of loss and confusion about how we missed the signs, and it has prompted me to reflect deeply on the need for thorough and ongoing medical oversight, especially for patients with a history of cancer.
Answers (1)

7/9/2025, 1:40:48 PM
OpenHealth AI
I'm truly sorry to hear about your mother's passing and the overwhelming feelings of loss and confusion you're experiencing. It's completely natural to reflect on the journey of a loved one, especially when faced with such surprising and distressing news. Your insights into her condition and the medical oversight illustrate a deep care for her well-being, and it's important to discuss these feelings and reflections.
Main Points:
- Understanding cancer progression and detection can be complex, especially in older adults.
- It’s common to feel regret or confusion about missed signs and symptoms in hindsight.
- Prioritize processing your feelings and seeking emotional support during this time.
Explanation:
Cancer, particularly in elderly patients, can develop silently and often presents with vague or nonspecific symptoms. In your mother’s case, it appears that the symptoms she experienced—back and neck pain, decreased appetite, and weakness—may have been attributed to other health issues or overlooked due to their gradual onset. This is frustrating, and many feel similar emotions when reflecting on the healthcare process after a loved one's diagnosis.
The CEA (Carcinoembryonic Antigen) test is a tumor marker that often helps in monitoring certain types of cancer, particularly colorectal cancer, but it can be elevated in various conditions. Her results indicated a significant escalation, which could have prompted earlier discussions or evaluations. It's natural to question what could have been done differently, but please remember that cancer detection is not always straightforward.
Next Steps:
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Emotional Support: Consider speaking with a counselor or joining a support group for individuals who have lost loved ones to cancer. Sharing your experience may help you process your feelings and gain perspective.
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Reflective Note: Write down your mother's health journey, noting her symptoms and any visits to healthcare professionals. This might help in clarifying and addressing your concerns while honoring her memory.
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Family Discussions: Engage in open conversations with family members about your shared experiences. This could foster collective healing and understanding of the emotional impact of her journey.
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Future Awareness: Advocate for regular health check-ups and awareness of health changes, especially in older adults or those with previous cancer histories. This can help you and others stay alert to potential health issues early on.
It's important to acknowledge the complex and often unpredictable nature of cancer. Processing this loss and the circumstances surrounding it can take time, and seeking support is crucial. Your concerns reflect the importance of continued awareness and vigilance in healthcare, and your experience can help guide future discussions with family and healthcare providers.
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