Concerns About My Father's Health and Medical Delays
My father, a 61-year-old Caucasian man who is 170 cm tall and weighs around 80 kg, has been facing serious health issues for several months. Despite his history as a former alcoholic who has remained sober for a few years, and being a habitual smoker, it took a considerable amount of time before the doctors arrived at a diagnosis. Ultimately, they concluded it’s cancer, likely lymphoma. For years, he has dealt with bladder complications stemming from past surgery that left him dependent on disposable catheters. This complication occurred due to an anesthesia issue during an ankle surgery involving a fracture. Through a combination of blood tests, MRI scans, and ultrasounds, cancer has been detected in his lymph nodes, lungs, and bladder. Although it’s uncommon for lymphoma to originate in the bladder, it is often the case that bladder cancer can metastasize to nearby lymph nodes, suggesting a potential progression that could have started years earlier in his bladder. The medical team remains uncertain about the cancer’s original site and initially indicated a biopsy would be performed. Recently, my father received a referral to see a urologist, but to my dismay, there was no mention of a biopsy in the documentation. His cervical lymph nodes are significantly swollen, and he’s enduring pain that requires him to take Tramadol, albeit with limited relief. Sleep has become a struggle for him, and he has difficulty lying comfortably in bed. During our last phone conversation, I noticed he was already experiencing voice loss. When I inquired if he felt pain in his throat, he mentioned it felt no different than usual, attributing his discomfort to shoulder and neck pain, expressing frustration over his weakening voice due to his work requirements for frequent phone calls. I spoke with him yesterday when his persistent coughing and voice cracks were alarming, and today, his voice appeared to be fading even more. I am deeply worried; the decline in his voice without any signs of cold or fever strikes me as peculiar, especially since he has been feeling poorly for months—enduring pain and fatigue. It feels as though his situation is deteriorating swiftly, yet he faces a wait of over a week for a follow-up visit with the urologist. Meanwhile, I am left pondering the status of the anticipated biopsy. I have encouraged him to reach out to the emergency room if his condition worsens and emphasized the importance of not hesitating to seek assistance if he feels things are escalating. He assured me he would, but I can’t shake the fear that he may be underreporting the severity of his symptoms to me. Although he doesn’t voice his fears, I can sense his anxiety. I’m uncertain about what guidance I’m seeking here. Is it standard procedure to have a urologist appointment after a possible lymphoma diagnosis? The physician who conducted the tests indicated a grave outlook, which raises the question of why this process feels so sluggish. If anyone can provide insight into this situation, I would greatly appreciate it, as I currently lack support. My own doctor is on vacation, and I’m unsure whether I can contact my father’s doctor due to the complicated public healthcare system in my country, where private hospitals do not conduct biopsies.
Answers (1)

7/7/2025, 1:20:54 PM
OpenHealth AI
I'm genuinely sorry to hear about your father's health struggles. Navigating a potential cancer diagnosis can be incredibly overwhelming, especially when coupled with other health complications. Your concerns about his symptoms and the perceived delays in care are valid, and I’ll provide you with some clarity and actionable next steps to consider.
Main Points:
- Your father's situation is complex, and he is facing multiple health issues, including possible lymphoma and significant discomfort.
- The follow-up with the urologist is typical due to the involvement of the bladder but should ideally include further investigation, such as a biopsy.
- Timely intervention is crucial, particularly given his worsening symptoms.
Explanation:
Lymphoma can indeed impact lymph nodes in various ways, and the presence of cancer in his lungs or bladder complicates matters. The swelling of cervical lymph nodes, voice changes, ongoing pain, and coughing can all be related to the progression of the disease or its treatments. The fact that he’s expressing difficulty in lying comfortably and showing signs of voice loss is concerning and warrants a more immediate review.
Seeing a urologist after a lymphoma diagnosis can be part of assessing the bladder's role in the broader diagnosis. However, the lack of mentions regarding a biopsy and the delays in appointments are understandably frustrating, especially given the level of pain and discomfort he is experiencing.
Next Steps:
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Encourage Immediate Action: If your father’s symptoms worsen—such as increased pain, difficulty breathing, severe coughing, or any drastic changes—he should go to the emergency room immediately. Ensure he understands that it's important to advocate for himself during these visits and express any escalating symptoms clearly.
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Maintain Open Communication: Regularly check in with your father about how he’s feeling, both physically and emotionally. This can help him express any fears or symptoms he might not mention otherwise.
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Document Symptoms: Encourage him to keep a symptom diary. This should include details about pain levels, changes in voice, sleep patterns, and any new symptoms. This record can be pivotal during appointments to communicate the severity and frequency of his experiences.
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Contact Healthcare Providers: Given the complexity of navigating the healthcare system, consider reaching out on his behalf, if possible. Explain your concerns: the need for clarity about the biopsy and express urgency about his symptoms to ensure they escalate care as needed.
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Explore Support Resources: Seek support from local cancer organizations or helplines that can guide you through advocating for your father’s care. They often have resources for families and can provide advice on managing similar situations.
While it's natural to feel anxious about his deteriorating situation, focusing on these actionable steps can help ensure he receives the attention he needs. You are doing an admirable job in supporting him through this difficult time. Please feel free to reach out if you have any more questions or need further guidance.
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