Struggling with a Compulsive Addiction to Antifreeze
Age 24, height 5'9", weight 150 lbs. Using a disposable account. I realize that what I'm doing is extremely harmful, and I'm fully aware of the severe risks involved. Please, I do not require a lecture on the dangers. Since 2022, I've been consuming antifreeze, specifically ethylene glycol, and I'm trapped in this cycle. To date, I've consumed it around 300 times. There are moments when I manage to go weeks or even months without it, yet the urge to drink it incessantly lingers in my mind. I have explored every possible resource for help, undergone multiple psychological evaluations, and participated in various therapies, but no one has been able to define the underlying issue or provide a viable solution. I’m not currently in a suicidal state; while I have occasionally ingested it with self-harm intentions, I generally do not want to end my life. Nevertheless, I recognize that I am quite possibly jeopardizing my health with these actions. I’ve needed hospitalization five times for overdosing on the substance, yet I haven’t sought out medical attention for my physical well-being aside from that. Desperation is setting in as I can't continue down this path. I feel I am causing damage not only to myself but also to those around me, and I simply cannot find a way to stop. The confusion of my situation drives me to believe I’ve lost my mind—no rational individual would engage in such behavior. Currently, I'm on bupropion and an iron supplement. My existing mental health diagnoses include Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) and unspecified anxiety. Previous diagnoses included social anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), bipolar disorder type 2, and panic disorder. Though borderline personality disorder (BPD) and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) have been considered, they remain undiagnosed. Aside from ethylene glycol, I am not using any other substances.
Answers (1)
7/2/2025, 2:40:40 PM
OpenHealth AI
I commend you for reaching out to discuss this deeply challenging situation. Recognizing that you're struggling with a compulsive addiction to antifreeze (ethylene glycol) is a significant and courageous step toward finding help. I understand that your primary concern is finding a way to overcome this addiction while managing your mental health conditions effectively.
Understanding the Situation
Ethylene glycol is a toxic substance, and consuming it poses severe health risks, including organ damage, metabolic issues, and even life-threatening situations. Given your history of overdoses and the emotional turmoil described, it’s crucial to address both the addiction and any underlying mental health issues in a comprehensive way.
Prioritized Next Steps
-
Immediate Support: Seek immediate support from a healthcare professional specializing in addiction. This may include contacting a substance use hotline or program specializing in substance dependence. Many facilities provide confidential assistance and can guide you on what's next.
-
Develop a Comprehensive Treatment Plan: Work with a mental health professional to establish a treatment approach that includes both your depression and anxiety management along with addressing the compulsive behavior. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) have shown efficacy in such situations.
-
Establish a Support Network: Consider joining a support group for individuals dealing with compulsive behaviors or addictions. Sharing experiences with others facing similar challenges can provide a sense of community and accountability.
-
Monitor Your Health: Make a plan to undergo regular health check-ups to monitor any physiological impacts of ethylene glycol consumption. If you are at risk of acute complications, having a clear health management strategy is essential.
-
Mindfulness and Coping Strategies: Integrate mindfulness practices, such as meditation or yoga, into your routine. These can help reduce anxiety and provide you with coping mechanisms to deal with cravings.
-
Build Healthy Coping Mechanisms: Identify and engage in activities that you enjoy and that provide a positive distraction from cravings. This could include hobbies, sports, or volunteering.
-
Document Your Experience: Keeping a journal about your feelings, patterns of consumption, and triggers may help you and your healthcare team understand better what prompts your behavior.
Remember, overcoming addiction and managing mental health concerns is a journey filled with ups and downs, and it's crucial to approach it with support and professional guidance. You are not alone in this, and there are people who can help guide you towards a healthier future.
Related Questions
[30M] Intermittent Crackling Noise from Chest Area
Hello everyone, I've been experiencing a crackling sound that occurs occasionally when I laugh heartily or cough. It seems to originate from my chest, but I'm not entirely sure if it might also be related to my throat. Interestingly, there’s no mucus or phlegm that surfaces when this happens. Despite my attempts, I can’t reproduce the sound by quickly exhaling or taking deep breaths. I don't struggle with wheezing or experience shortness of breath. There’s a persistent cough I’ve had since dealing with the flu last December, but I can recall having these sounds before that incident. Additionally, I suffered from asthma as a child, which I suspect could be a contributing factor. I'm planning to schedule an appointment with my primary care physician for a comprehensive evaluation, ideally including an X-ray. Meanwhile, I would greatly appreciate any advice or insights you might have. Thank you in advance!
Understanding Post-Surgical Pain After Ganglion Cyst Removal
I’m 17 years old (female, though I prefer He/him pronouns) and I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS) along with Dysautonomia. Currently, I’m not taking any medications that might impact my situation apart from an SNRI and birth control to manage cramping. Around a month ago, I underwent surgery to remove a ganglion cyst located on my dominant wrist (the right one). This cyst had been present for roughly three years, and despite my doctor attempting to aspirate it, the procedure was unsuccessful due to its firmness, leading to surgical intervention. This cyst significantly limited my wrist mobility. Now, after approximately four weeks post-surgery, I can say that my wrist is mostly improved. The scar is healing fairly well, and I’ve regained about half of my wrist’s mobility compared to the left one. Yet, I still experience significant pain when I move or apply pressure on the area that housed the cyst. Is this pain considered normal? Additionally, my fingers are in constant discomfort, and my wrist seems to dislocate frequently. Due to my EDS, I am accustomed to joint pain and dislocations, but this particular pain feels more severe than what I usually endure. When I brought this up with my surgeon, he dismissed my concerns, stating that such dislocations are common for individuals my age. However, I experience dislocations at least twice daily, and the process of resetting them creates such a loud sound that I've been asked to leave classes to avoid disturbing others. Is this normal? Could it be related to the cyst? Moreover, about four days ago, I noticed a small lump forming on my wrist just above the surgical area. When I consulted my doctor about it, he informed me that it was a benign fatty tumor and assured me it wasn't a serious issue. However, I've never encountered anything like this before, and while the lump is not painful, soft, and relatively small, I’m puzzled about its sudden appearance. Why did this occur, and what could explain my doctor’s nonchalant attitude towards my symptoms? I understand that experiencing pain and limited mobility after surgery is not unusual, but given my doctor’s dismissive approach towards my concerns, I felt compelled to seek insight here as well. He often seems skeptical about the symptoms I report, making it difficult for me to fully trust his evaluations.
Concerns About Changes in Partner's Semen Consistency
At 19 years old, I’m seeking some insights regarding a situation. My girlfriend, who is also 19, has experienced a noteworthy change in her semen consistency during our intimate encounters over the last two to three weeks. To provide some background, she stands at 5 feet 5.5 inches tall and weighs approximately 130 pounds. Her ethnicity is Caucasian, and she is from Canada. Historically, my girlfriend has been in good health without any significant medical conditions. Currently, she is not taking any medications. Previously, she had a history of frequent vaping, but that was about a year ago, and now she limits it to occasional use. The change in her semen is quite striking; it appears very thick, white, and somewhat chunky, rather than being mostly liquid. There are some liquid components, but the thick texture predominates. Throughout this period, she has maintained her regular diet, and importantly, there are no signs of a urinary tract infection or sexually transmitted disease. Neither does she experience any pain or unusual odors. This alteration has raised some concerns for her, and while I am trying to be supportive, I am uncertain about the potential causes. We searched online for explanations, but the reactions we found mostly related to digital sources that discussed various infections or medical conditions, none of which seemed to match her symptoms. Does anyone have insights or similar experiences regarding this matter? It would be appreciated in easing her worries and determining the best course of action.
Seeking Answers: Unexplained Symptoms
Profile Information: - **Age**: 15 - **Gender**: Female - **Height**: 5'3 - **Ethnicity**: Caucasian **Medication Regimen**: - Lisdexamfetamine: 40 mg daily - Famotidine: 20 mg, twice daily - Cetirizine: 40 mg daily I have been experiencing persistent pain for as long as I can recall, even before I started taking any medication, so I am skeptical about the drugs affecting my condition. Below is a compilation of my symptoms that I can remember offhand. My family has been advised on multiple occasions to consider testing for Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) due to the alignment of my symptoms with the condition. My latest physician conducted laboratory tests to evaluate my tryptase levels without an initial baseline measurement. This was taken roughly 1.5 hours post-flare-up, which came back low. Consequently, she concluded that I do not have MCAS, but after researching further, I found that low levels do not definitively rule it out. I am reaching out for guidance—can anyone assist me in understanding my situation? **Presented Symptoms**: - Persistent hives - Facial flushing - Cognitive fog - Recurring headaches - Abdominal discomfort - Irregular bowel movements (ranging from diarrhea to constipation) - Anxiety attacks - Low blood pressure - Episodes of dizziness - Rapid heartbeat - Chronic fatigue - Episodes of fever - Severe joint pain - Night sweats - Bloating - Elevated sensitivity to sunlight - Intolerance to heat I frequently experience multiple symptoms together during flare-ups, with at least one flare occurring daily. The hives tend to emerge 1 to 3 times each day, primarily triggered by sun exposure and heightened emotional states, although at times they arise with no apparent cause. These flare-ups can occur abruptly, lasting anywhere from 15 minutes to several hours.
Three Weeks Post Gallbladder Surgery - Is It Infected?
Patient Profile: - Age: 35 - Gender: Female - Height: 5 feet 4 inches - Weight: 160 pounds - Ethnicity: Asian Issue Duration: 3 weeks Location: United States Relevant Medical History: Approximately three weeks ago, I underwent gallbladder removal surgery. Recently, I have observed a slight amount of cloudy fluid emerging from the surgical site over the past few days. Just moments ago, I noticed a possible pus discharge from the incision. While there is no significant pain, I do feel mild soreness when shifting my position. I have not experienced any fever or chills, and there is no unpleasant odor coming from the wound. Should I continue to clean the area with soap and water, or would it be prudent to seek immediate medical attention at the ER for a professional evaluation?