Navigating Parental Presence During Medical Appointments
19 years old, 5'5'', weighing 193 pounds, multiracial, without any health issues or medications relevant to this situation, residing in the United States. Almost a month ago, I shared my dilemma about how to ask my parents to refrain from accompanying me to medical appointments. I received some helpful advice, one of which was to contact the office in advance and request that my parents be asked to step out. I attempted this approach, but the receptionist mentioned, "We don’t accommodate such requests; you’ll need to discuss it with the nurse when you arrive." I attended my appointment just a few days ago, and my mother joined me as usual. Since she is friendly with the nursing staff, I found it challenging to speak with them privately as they kept engaging with her. Nevertheless, I managed to get the hearing test I was anxious about; my hearing has been deteriorating, and although my mother initially objected, I was able to confirm the test with the nurse before she had a chance to respond. This was somewhat of a win, although I still lacked the needed privacy. To my surprise, my doctor didn’t even inquire if I preferred my mother to leave; she simply stated, "I know you appreciate having your mother here, so she can stay," which was rather amusing. Looking ahead, I’m hopeful as the office has a new policy indicating that patients age out at 21, instead of the previous 25 years. They have changed hands recently, and under the new management, the age limit has been revised. This particular practice poses challenges for me because the nursing staff has a personal rapport with my mother (she even has their personal contact numbers). Additionally, my mother tends to follow me to the restroom since it’s adjacent to the nurses’ area, which makes it difficult for me to have a private conversation with anyone there, apart from trying to reach out beforehand (which proved ineffective).
Answers (1)

6/23/2025, 3:20:41 PM
OpenHealth AI
It sounds like you're navigating a challenging situation with your parents' presence during medical appointments, which can feel frustrating when you're seeking independence and privacy. Here are some key points and actionable steps to help you address this concern effectively.
Main Points:
- You want more privacy during medical appointments without your parents present, particularly concerning health discussions.
- The current office policy and staff rapport with your mother complicate this further.
- You recently successfully advocated for a necessary hearing test, which indicates your ability to speak up for yourself.
Explanation:
Managing parental presence in medical settings is common among young adults seeking autonomy in their healthcare. It's essential to advocate for yourself effectively, especially regarding concerns that could impact your health, like your hearing changes. The office's new policy about age limits is a positive sign that they may become more accommodating to your wishes.
Next Steps:
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Direct Communication with Staff: At your next appointment, consider directly voicing your need for privacy to the medical staff, starting with the nurse. You might say something like, “I appreciate my mom being here, but I prefer to have private conversations about my health.”
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Schedule Appointments: If possible, try to schedule your appointments at times when you know your mother is less likely to be able to attend, or find out if they can accommodate you in a way that reduces her involvement for specific discussions.
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Written Requests: You could write a brief note ahead of your appointment explaining your wish for privacy and giving it to the office staff in advance. This can clarify your needs before you arrive without having to address it face-to-face initially.
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Establish Boundaries: Be clear with your mother about your desire for independence regarding your health. You can explain that while you value her support, you also need to take charge of your health decisions as an adult.
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Utilize New Policies: Since the office has changed their policy regarding age limits, be proactive about this transition. When you reach that age threshold, ask to review their policies regarding patient independence.
Reassurance:
Remember, advocating for your health needs is an important step in becoming an independent adult, and it’s entirely appropriate to seek that level of privacy during healthcare discussions. Please feel confident in your ability to navigate these conversations as you work towards greater autonomy in your healthcare.
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