Struggling with Guidance from a Higher Power and Mental Health Challenges
As a 30-year-old woman, I have encountered numerous psychiatric diagnoses throughout my life, including schizoaffective disorder and various personality disorders. At present, I am identified as having a severe personality disorder characterized by negative emotions. My current medication regimen consists of 1000 mg of Lithium, 100 mg of Sertraline, and 4.5 mg of Haloperidol. Recently, I had a troubling experience where I felt compelled by an entity named Ruin, from the Mistborn series, to harm myself. Initially, instead of following through in the way he suggested, I resorted to cutting my leg, which resulted in a visit to the emergency department for stitching. I spent six hours at the hospital but had to leave before consulting the mental health professionals; I was concerned about developing pressure sores because sitting in a wheelchair for too long is detrimental to my health, as my mobility is limited due to a functional neurological disorder. Today, Ruin expressed frustration over my previous choice and urged me more forcefully to hurt myself. I ultimately did cut my neck and required stitches—10 in total. I can't shake the fear that the psychiatric liaison will dismiss me again, just as they did before. The pressure I feel from this so-called God is overwhelming, and I feel utterly powerless against it. I’m reaching out for guidance on what steps I should take next. My situation is unfolding in the UK, and I desperately seek advice on handling this dire predicament.
Answers (1)
3/23/2025, 12:50:36 AM
OpenHealth AI
I'm really sorry to hear about what you're experiencing. It sounds incredibly difficult, and I want you to know that reaching out for help is a strong and important step. You're not alone, and there are ways to navigate this challenging situation.
Main Points
- Immediate Safety: Your safety is the top priority. It's critical to seek immediate help if you're feeling compelled to harm yourself.
- Engaging Mental Health Support: Connecting with mental health professionals can provide you with the support and guidance you need.
- Coping Strategies: Finding strategies to manage overwhelming emotions and thoughts will be beneficial.
Explanation
Having severe feelings of distress, especially those connected to compelling thoughts or entities, can be incredibly overwhelming. Your psychiatric history shows that you have faced many challenges, and it’s important to have supportive professionals who can understand and help you through this. The experience of pressure to harm yourself from an entity can feel very real and troubling. It’s important to take your feelings seriously.
Next Steps
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Reach Out for Immediate Support:
- If you feel like you're in crisis or have thoughts of self-harm, please contact emergency services or a crisis hotline in your area. In the UK, you can call Samaritans at 116 123, available 24/7, for immediate emotional support.
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Safety Planning:
- Create a safety plan if you haven't already. This might include identifying warning signs, coping strategies, and a list of people you can contact when you're feeling overwhelmed. Having this plan in place can be a helpful tool in moments of crisis.
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Consistent Mental Health Support:
- It’s crucial to engage regularly with your mental health team. Though you may have had frustrating experiences in the past, communicating your needs and feelings can lead to better support. You might consider expressing any fears about being dismissed during your next appointment and seeking a psychologist or psychiatric nurse to discuss your feelings more deeply.
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Coping Strategies:
- Practice grounding techniques, such as deep breathing or mindfulness exercises, to help you manage overwhelming thoughts and emotions. Writing in a journal about your feelings can also help clarify your thoughts and serve as an outlet.
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Reach Out to Trusted Individuals:
- Talk to someone you trust about how you're feeling. Sharing your experiences can help you feel less isolated and create a support network.
Please know that you deserve help and support. It will take time, but with the right resources and support, you can work through these feelings.
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